“We are each of us angels with only one wing, and we can only fly by embracing one another.” – Luciano de Crescenzo
After posting my last entry; Wounded Healer, I received an overwhelming amount of messages from people who were touched by the life of Saphie, the little, gray mare. Even complete strangers reached out, sharing their own, sometimes heartbreaking stories with me. Many marveled over the capacity horses have for forgiveness and the wisdom they hold, if we dare to listen. Many also shared their own difficulties of following the path, when the rest of the world stands still around us.
I read each message with a growing sense of wonder. It was hard to ignore what these messages were telling me: out there, in the world, there exists other people who are discovering horses the same way as I am. Together - yet separately - we are being touched by horses and guided down the Path. A coincidence? Hardly. It seems as if the horses of the world have made a collective decision to start showing humans another way, to tell us about a new level of consciousness, to teach us how life really should be lived.
Or perhaps there was no decision, perhaps this is something written in the horse’s DNA. We know that horses live in the present moment, despite any baggage they may carry from their past. And because of that, horses have the before mentioned capacity to forgive. They will take you at face value, just as you are, even if yesterday you were someone else. All you have to do is open your heart and be willing to change. Because they are always ready - and have been for centuries.
I look back at my life and see how horses always tried to offer me wisdom, but how I was not ready receive it, not in its full extent. When I was younger, I used to love riding horses. I would ride any horse given to me and take pride in the way I was able to connect with the animal. Yes, I was a talented rider and had the ability to transform even the less capable horse into a nicely moving mount. Riding dressage was like a drug for me, I sought it over and over again, finally riding up to six horses a day.
But why did I ride? What was it that was so addicting? People used to ask this question over and over again, and every time I gave the same answer.
“When I’m riding, it’s like I can’t think of anything else. I have to just be there, on that horse.”
I’m sure others who have ridden or still do understand what I mean. When you sit on a horse, be it in the arena or on the trails, it’s hard to mentally be anywhere else. There is something about the horse that doesn’t allow you to lose focus. The horse guides you into the moment and the feeling of being in the moment, being free from the past and the present, is utterly addicting.
And I suppose that is why most people ride, even if they don’t consciously think about it. Horses have the ability to pull you away from you left brain into your right brain, as if you were meditating. Suddenly whatever happened at work earlier that day or the argument you had with your kids in the car or the work that awaits you at home doesn’t matter. Nothing else matters but the ride.
Of course in hindsight I see now that what I was feeling during my rides was just a promise of what could be; it was the edge of the matter, not the center. When I sat on a horse and forced it to perform for me, what I felt was not connectedness (although I thought it was that, at the time), but a passing shadow of the harmony the horse could have offered me, had I truly listened. What I experienced was the horse, even after being oppressed, still reaching out and sending his message: “Seek me. I’m in here. And I am willing to share my wisdom.”
But now I do feel, see and hear what horses have to say, and so do others – all over the world. We may not be many and we are nowhere near of becoming a majority, but we exist, nevertheless. Life is not always easy for the pioneers. My joy over discovering horse wisdom has been and continues to often be mixed with feelings of frustration, anger and complete isolation. There are times when I feel desperately alone. There are days when I want to quit. Yes. Walk away and never look back. But then I realize that I am well beyond the point of walking away. Because when you have seen the light, it’s hardly possible to ignore it, even if others are trying to pull you back into the darkness.
A year and a half ago I started writing this blog, not only to sort out my own thoughts and feelings, but in the hopes of making a difference in someone’s life, even if it meant reaching only one person who is experiencing the same emotions as I am. And your messages, the ones which poured in after the last blog post, but also the ones I have received along the way, are proof that I am not in this alone. And neither are you. We are all connected over the universe through our horses, beautiful horses that shine their collective wisdom over anyone who is ready to take it in.
I urge you: let’s not only continue traveling down this path, but let's make sure others know what we are doing. I am not asking you to stand up in arms, nor am I suggesting you start preaching, because it is never possible to force others onto the path. But we can lead silently, by example.
“We must remember that one determined person can make a significant difference, and that a small group of determined people can change the course of history.” - Sonia Johnson
Thank you for reading and believing.