Good boy

Put your head down for the halter.
Stand still in the aisle.
Stop chewing on the lead rope.
Give me your feet.
Stop nipping at me when I tighten the girth.
Open your mouth for the bit.
Close your mouth to tighten the noseband.
Stop moving your head.

Stand still, for crying out loud, can’t you see I’m on the mounting block. Don’t pull on the reins. No backing up. Let go of the whip, it’s not yours. Stop nipping at my leg when I mount.

Go. Move forward energetically, with impulsion, not like an old cow, be a horse, for once.
Stop. There is nothing in the corner of the arena, just like there wasn’t anything yesterday or any day before that, so stop being stupid and get back to work or else.
Go. We’ll be in this arena until you do what I say even if it takes me all night.
Stop. First I have a bad day at the office and now you have to be a little shit.
Go. I don’t have time for games; I can get the draw reins, if I have to.

Stand still when I put the cooler on. Stop rubbing your face on your leg, it’s such an irritating habit. Don’t slobber my jacket, I just washed it. Stop chewing on the reins. Walk slower. Walk faster.
Stop.
Go.
Stop.

Stand still in the aisle while I take the tack off.
I s a i d s t i l l.
Give me your head.
Give me your feet.
Give me your soul.
Hey! Stop nipping at me, I’m only trying to brush you. Stop. That’s it. Crossties are for horses who just won’t listen. It’s your own fault.

Don’t run through the door. Watch my feet. Watch me. And don’t roll in your box with the cooler on, you get straw everywhere and it’s such a nuisance, I don’t want to have to brush you again. Stand still while I change the blanket. Put your head down to take off the halter. No, you can't leave, you need to stay in the box.  Move your head. 
Move. 
Stop.
Get away from me.

Hey! That hurt.

Who’s my boy?
Aaaww, you are so cute. Mommy’s got a bucket with food in it. Mommy’s got some carrots. I have to go now, but I’ll be back at the same time tomorrow.
Be good. I love you so much.
You are such a good boy - the best.

God loved the birds and invented trees.  Man loved the birds and invented cages. - Jacques Deval, Afin de vivre bel et bien

~K